"Daddy made me a swing!"

Reuben has been wanting to put a swing up for K because she just LOVES to "sail" up into the blue sky. A couple weeks ago he selected a tree in our yard and made a swing for a very delighted little girl!

K's a total clown on it... extending her arms in a way that puts her in nearly a laying position... jerking herself back and forth to make the leaves on the tree rustle... she just loves it! Thankfully, due to the way the swing is made, it's very safe for her, in spite of her cavorting. And the higher we can push her, the better she likes it!

What'cha doin' up there, Daddy? Can I come up?

Please get that nice and tight, Daddy. I don't wanna fall!

Come on, Daddy! Hurry up!!!

OK, fine. If you're gonna be so poky slow, I'll just go in my obstacle course!

Mommy and me

Trial run!

Care-free little girl... Happy as a lark!

It's over... (Email updates)

August 9, 4:48pm

Well, it's over.

Baby was born yesterday (August 8th), but our attorney just called about an hour ago to tell us that Birthmom had decided to keep her baby.  We were stunned and of course brokenhearted.  We are not angry at Birthmom; it is her right to keep her baby. The problem is that we had already had come to love this little guy who we thought was going to be our son. Up until Tuesday of this week, everything seemed to be in place. Birthmom was genuinely planning to place him with us.

The first hint of trouble came yesterday when the attorney called us and said that Birthmom had decided to have skin to skin contact with Baby after birth. The hospital social worker said that, in her experience, that has almost always led to failed adoptions.

Naturally, our fears were aroused, but we still hoped and prayed for the best.

About a half hour after getting the news this afternoon, I texted Birthmom... told her that the attorney just informed us of her decision.  I told her that we are not angry at her... that we love her... that we are still her friends.  I meant every word.  She wrote a really sweet text back.

It is not ours to know the reason behind all of this.  It seems pointless to have had 6 weeks of hope and preparation, only to have it fall apart like this.  But God doesn't owe us an answer.  He makes no mistakes.  We really do believe that, even though we definitely can't see it.

Please pray for us as we go home to an empty crib... unpack our little boy clothes... face K's daily inquiries and love of the word "Baby"... and simply the death of a very real dream.  Last year on August 16th we got the call that the baby we were planning to adopt had died in utero.  Now this year on August 9th, we get this call.

And please pray for Birthmom and this baby we love.  I have no idea what their future will hold.  She has nothing to provide for him... no diapers, no clothes, nothing. We ache.....

Thank you so much for hoping with us, and now for praying with us.

~Judi, for our family

************************************

8/13/14

We arrived safely home last evening, Praise the Lord.  It was painful to walk into our house without the baby we fully expected to bring home with us.  I told Reuben that it kind of feels like we went to the hospital (trip to PA) and instead of bringing home a baby, we brought a tissue box instead.

I am reading through the Psalms these days… so comforting.  David, a man after God’s own heart, let himself feel his pain deeply… cried a lot… but after pouring out his grief, he almost always turned his focus back on God.  And that is the balance Reuben and I are seeking to find: being honest with our grief and the very real loss we are going through, and yet in the midst of our grieving and tears still keep our eyes on God.

God is good.  None of this makes sense humanly speaking… so many unanswered questions… so much emptiness and brokenness for both of us, though we express it in different ways.  And yet, here and there, we see little bits of beauty that are coming out of this, and we praise God.

Please keep praying; and thank you for journeying with us.

God bless you!

~Judi, for our family

2 YEARS old!!!

That's right! Our darling, high-maintenance, flamboyantly joyful little girl has reached her second birthday. Time flies!!!  In some ways it seems like a long time since her birth... since we first held her tiny little body next to our hearts. But the idea of the next many years (till whenever she leaves home) flying as fast as the last two..... I don't like that one bit!  I want her to grow, to mature, etc. but I don't want her to leave!  As I often say, she's an awful lot of work (most always on the move, all day long), but she's even more joy.

WE LOVE OUR LITTLE DARLING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here she is...

Mystery activity

Who can guess what we were doing last evening???

Little bit of catch-up!

Well, it's pretty easy to see that regular life has crowded out blogging.  With summer here--trips, vacation Bible school, gardening, baby planning, etc.--posting pictures online has gotten bumped even lower on the priority list than before.

Baby planning? Yes! Long story short, 2 weeks ago we found out through a mutual friend of a little boy that's due to put in his appearance in a few weeks.  His mom has chosen us to be his parents!! Talk about AWESOME!!!!!!

Anyway, here's a few small pictures.  Hope you can see them properly. If they're too small, just click on them, and they should enlarge for you.

--The first 3 are of my side kick and me shelling peas.  She loves eating them, too. :-)
--The 4th picture is of our little family at the zoo. It was HOT, and we felt a little wilted.
--The 5th picture captures in part both K's eagerness to go "bye-bye" (accompanied by a twist and wave of her little hand), and her ever-blossoming independence.  She's such a big girl that is growing up so fast and yet still loves to be rocked and have lots of hugs and kisses.
--The 6th picture is of K's hair before being combed... when it looks, as her uncle terms it, "hairy scary!" :-)

Well, that's all for now.  Probably the next post will include pictures of our little man!

Our dandelion princess

A few pics from this morning...

K was out in her fenced-in play area (to keep her off the road), when it struck me that all those dandelions around her would be fun to put in her hair.  So I commandeered 3 for the purpose and then took some pics while K was enjoying the novelty of this spring flower.  :-)

IT IS FINISHED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“A woman when she is in travail hath sorrow, because her hour is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world” (John 16:21).

The last 3 ¼ years (since our adoption journey began in January 2011) have been full of many ups and downs… eagerness, agony, anxiousness, impatience, surprises (both happy and not), gains, losses, etc. But now our 3 ¼ year “hour” (above verse) is over, and the labor of it is already beginning to fade in the presence of the reality that IT IS FINISHED!!!

To any who would consider adoption, we would give our whole-hearted encouragement.  It is not in any way for the weak of heart. You must be willing to laugh, to cry, to gain, to lose, to hope even when hope is dashed over and over, to have faith when there is no sight, to stand firm and “count Him faithful who has promised”.  But the blessed relief of finally—after years of waiting and praying—having a child to call your own is unspeakably precious. No more ifs/ands/buts. She/he is yours. Finally.

As of Wednesday afternoon, April 30th, at 4:05pm, K is officially our daughter! PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sandbox--and BIG NEWS!

Here's K's new form of entertainment while we're outside.  We also built a little mesh fence to keep her from wondering onto the road. She LOOOVES being outside, and this will provide a safe place for her while we're gardening, etc.

 

Spring is here, and we're loving it!!! 

But here's the BIG NEWS:

WE HAVE A FINALIZATION COURT DATE! 

 On Wednesday, April 30th, K will be our legal daughter!!!

Adoption Journey Email Update--Feb. 25, 2014

Hi, All…

Ugh.  This is really terrible.  I’ve lost the email (that’s another story), but I think this is my first update since last November!!!  My reasons are reasonable (in my mind): a previously unheated office, a little girlie who hates having Mommy on the computer, and—the worst—having my offline email program (which is what mainly use for correspondence) crash—twice!  So not fun.  Which is why I don’t have a copy of even the November update.  So if I’m redundant or am not giving necessary information, pardon me! You’ll just have to ask questions (or else ignore repetitive info) as kindly as you can.  THERE. I explained myself. :-)

As it currently stands, the presumed birthfather’s rights have been terminated in court (praise God!) and we are waiting on the state social worker to file the final court report, after which we can get a finalization date.    Please pray that there are no more delays!!!

On a side note…  In the adoption world there is often talk about the tragedy of abortion… how awful it is… how sad.  I wholeheartedly agree!!! However, a friend recently sent the following link to me (http://thelewisnote.blogspot.com/2014/02/why-miscarriage-matters-if-youre-pro.html, and I thought I’d share it since the article rounds out the view on the sanctity of human life vs. abortion.  Certainly there is a vast difference between intentionally killing a child and losing one that was longed for, but sometimes miscarriage is too lightly brushed off.  The author’s words struck a deep chord with me, and I felt the writing was definitely worth passing on. (My only disagreement with the author is where she seems to imply that miscarriage is not God’s will, and we cannot expect to experience peace in it.  I believe that as Christians we CAN find peace in the midst of pain, and rest in the midst of a restless sea of questions, grief, and unknowns.)

I’ve attached a few pictures that I thought might interest you.  K is growing up so fast!!!  Her totally absolute favorite word is “Hi!”  All day long.  And if you don’t pay attention and return the greeting, she will resort to a longer form: “Mommy, hi.  Mommy, Mommy HI!”  :-)  I never get tired of it.  Of course she charms others with the word, too.  Cashiers, friends, and strangers alike.  (Someday we will have to teach her “stranger danger” :-)).  K continues to be a high-energy, high-maintenance child that leaves Mommy and Daddy no dull moments!  Most people outside our little family only see her in high gear, but she does have slower times, too.  One of her favorite activities is looking at photo albums.  She’s pretty good about it, too.  The only trouble is when she tries to retrieve the pictures from their resting places inside the pages…. “K, no!  Don’t rip the pages!”  She has also taken to “writing” on her tablet while sitting at church.  I THINK she’s getting a little better at being reverent. :-)

Till next time…

Judi